#and it simply involved these 3 pictures together
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sandushengshou · 1 year ago
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modern yunmeng jiang recruitment posters
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mossyivy · 8 months ago
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NSFW ALPHABET
[DI! Leon S Kennedy Edition]
❗Minors Do Not Interact ❗
A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)
Cuddler, massive cuddler. Honestly I see Leon as enjoying his partner being cuddled up to his chest but as long as you're touching each other he really doesn't mind. He just needs to be grounded after sex because he's not use to intimacy. (Remember y'all, aftercare in important FOR EVERYBODY INVOLVED DOM/SUB/SWITCH WHOEVER!!!)
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)
Definitely proud of his arms. Man's got two pythons where his forearms are supposed to be. I'd be proud of those bitches too. It also doesn't help how often you tend to cling to them, admire them while cuddling up together or compliment how they look when he flexes.
When Leon's asked the good old "tits or ass?" question older than time itself he smirks and simply says thighs. He loves something plush to nap on when he comes home from work. He always says it'll be a quick 30 minute nap but he's always out for 3 hours when he's laying his head on your lap. They're just such a nice pillow and even nicer wrapped around his head.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Usually prefers finishing inside. If not then on your stomach. There's just something mesmerizing about watching his cum slowly drip out of you on down your belly that just makes him so horny that he can't get enough of you.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Okay... So you send Leon pictures and he saves them. (He'd never share them though) But he secretly has an album in his phone labeled as WORK meticulously organization so that when you open the album it has important looking photos but if you scroll far enough it's just things you've sent him. Nudes, videos, even screenshots of steamy texts.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)
Decently experienced. Enough to get him by but also good at listening to his partner. Takes criticism well in the bedroom. Just wants his partner to have a good time and show that he loves you.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
On your side or anything he can see your face. He's often tired so slow easy strokes on his side and using his hands is right up his alley. But for when he's feeling more energetic he's definitely up anything he can see your reaction with. He aims to please and the man is a good shot.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Definitely 50/50. Leon can crack jokes when his life is at risk I'm sure he'd probably say something goofy to make you laugh or even something stupid like "come here often?" When you're changing positions and his creaky body pops or cracks he'll say some smart ass comment about the bed makes weird sounds again.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Definitely trimmed. Leon doesn't strike me as a massively hairy guy to begin with. But what hair he does have is well kept.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Intimacy is his favorite part of it all. Very tender and soft compared to what he is during work. Enjoys the touching the most. He's very touch starved. Cuddle him and he'll melt into a puddle. He LOVES being little spoon.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
Jerks off often. Uses it as a stress relief thing but doesn't do it as often when he gets a partner. But I do think when he's away on cases and he has downtime at night he tends to call his partner and have phone sex.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Begging, biting, breeding, dirty talk, edging and roleplaying
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Anywhere at home. Leon would most likely be super hesitant about doing anything outside of the house and risking criminal record.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
His partners touch. Leon just really likes being touched. If you mostly just kiss him and move to his neck (it's sensitive, that's why he rarely wears anything that constricts his neck) you'll get him going in no time.
N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)
No hitting, nothing with feet, no bathroom related stuff, no voyeurism or exhibitionism and no humiliation
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
50/50. But definitely more giving in the oral department. Uses it as a form of foreplay. Enjoys it because he loves hearing your slowly break and cry for him.
Sometimes he's just to exhausted to fuck so those are the times he'll just straight up tell you to sit on his face. He doesn't care if you're bigger, he knows you're not gonna hurt him. If you try hovering her will definitely wrap his arms around your thighs and pull you down on him. The man is skilled with his mouth and hands. So be prepared for the time of your life.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Definitely slow sensual type of guy. He likes making every moment last. But there's definitely been a flurry of passion after gets back from particularly long cases.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
If he has to go out for work and he has a little bit of time before leaving, most definitely he'd be down for a quickie.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
He's fine with experimenting but not often.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Good for 3 rounds unless he's super tired. Last decently long, always makes sure his partner gets off first each time.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Oh Leon definitely owns one of those vibrators that work with apps. Sometimes when he's due to come home and he knows you have it in you he'll just tease you on the way home.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Usually Leon doesn't tease but when he's in a particular frisky mood, he will make beg to cum. And he doesn't care if you want it. If you don't beg like he wants he will make you wait and keep bringing you to the edge over and over like an asshole.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Not loud in the slightest but he's definitely not scared to moan or whimper. Even curse under his breath, especially if he has you on your side and he's right in your ear.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Said I love you for the first time during sex. Was mortified with himself, he meant it but was extremely embarrassed. Apologized profusely and told you he did mean it. And thankfully you love him back, obviously.
X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)
Ah yes, python 3. I'll be honest, I'd say he's at the higher average end in size but makes up for it in girth... Like a fucking coke can.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Leon had little to no sex drive but once you two got into a relationship he's like a teenage boy again. Can barely stop from wanting you all the time. But he's still more of the romantic intimate type and would rather just exist with you than constantly be at each other.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
He clings onto life afterwards. Just wants to make sure you're taken care of but the second you relax against him he's down for the count. Like a god damn bear in hibernation.
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anantaru · 11 months ago
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hear me out.. this is fluffy 🥹
imagine wriothesley as a dad, especially a girl dad! (thanks to his teaser for this idea!!!)
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cw. ・✶ 。 none, fluff, established relationship (he's your husband), girl dad wriothesley <3 (she's around 6), fem! reader
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the love wriothesley has for his daughter is the purest form of love.
it's new— and he has never felt it before, in fact, it cannot be compared with anything else in this universe.
as it was in his life, wriothesley was severely occupied as the duke of the fortress and such was the wonderful reason as to why he likes to appreciate the little moments that happen in your day to day life with your daughter— the feeling of protecting his child was inexpressible, and in order for him to at least miss you both a little bit less or make it become somewhat bearable, wriothesley finds himself romanticizing the morning hours of the day.
the duke starts his day with greeting you, his wife, and his cute daughter before he helps you to get her ready as much as he can— side note your daughter has his eyes, and if words could describe it only a little bit, she looks just like an angel.
also— it might be silly, or maybe it just looks silly seeing your husband struggle like that, but something about him doing your daughters hair was— by the same token, very cute and quite hilarious.
that's when his alter ego, the quote on quote, “hair stylist wriothesley”, comes into place.
not beating around the bush, but your husband was surprisingly very good at doing her hair. obviously, he does it the same way you showed him, yet he will always add a ridiculous amount of bedazzled hair accessories to her head.
to say that wriothesley was a big fan of glittery, sparkly head pieces would be a clear understatement— but do not try to put them on his hair, this dangerous route will take you to a tickle competition you simply cannot win, not even if you tried your hardest.
the duke didn't see anything wrong with clipping a bunch of radiant hair accessories on her head, even though she might end up looking like a disco ball— not that your daughter minds it, archons, she utterly adored it whenever her dad did her hair!
she was, in fact, the biggest fan of her dad doing it, because they got to spend some quality time together before he would be gone for the majority of her day. how he kneels down behind her while she sits on the little seat in front of her child-sized vanity, looking at her dad through glowy, admiring eyes while he does her hair for the day.
sadly, wriothesley knows that after that he has to work, he must and it will always take him all his power to get going— before that though, he will tell you both goodbye, add a small kiss on his daughters forehead before giving you a small peck on the lips.
how deeply he wanted to spend the day with you two, maybe walk around fontaine so you could shop around— because last time you did that, you actually found a matching outfit for you and your daughter and wriothesley found it to be one of the cutest, little memories in his mind.
he even took a picture of the two of you and keeps it in his wallet at all times now. who knows but when he feels like it becomes unbearable while being apart from his family, he tends to just look at it and smile.
when wriothesley met you, his live truly has changed forever.
you gave him pure, unfaltering love, deep compassion and of course— a family, something he thought he'd never be able to have.
being a parent certainly wasn't an easy task, and it was important to navigate through future differences that might occur one way or the other, more so seek out a good way to find the best possible solution for everybody involved.
not only for your marriage sake, but for your own childs sake— and wriothesley cannot wait to teach her valuable life lessons, about giving love to the world and the importance of following your dreams, opening his arms for his child with kindness, provide his cute daughter with hope, real hope.
while lastly, make his child excited to see this world and grow up with two wonderful parents that love her so very much.
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©2024 anantaru do not repost, copy, translate, modify, claim as your own
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anundyingfidelity · 6 months ago
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DEVOTION — Dean, Sam
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Summary: You get into the path of the Winchester brothers, and since then, nothing is the same once a bond strictly agreed for pleasure is created between you and them. When they want, they follow you, and you know they always follow.
Pairing: Dean x goddess of rain reader x Sam
Word count: 2,1k.
Warnings: smut, threesome, vaginal sex, anal sex (no dp, sorry i failed as a slut in here), voyeurism, light choking, light spanking, marking, praising, light degradation, pet names, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, oral - male receiving (female receiving mentioned), facefucking, fingering, hints to aftercare, p*rn without much plot honestly.
Also my main language is not english just in case lmao, enjoy! and thanks everyone for the encouragement on this. <3
GEN MASTERLIST!
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“Oh, Dean…” you gasp as pleasure takes you.
The softness of your skin on top of him, his rough hands gripping tightly on your sides and rubbing your ass cheeks create a familiar sensation you yearn for too much. Every time it is like electricity is running all down your spine.
He takes your thrusts as you ride him with soft, deep groans falling off his beautiful plump lips. His hips are pushing up just a little, so he can let you know how desperate he is for you. Of feeling you, of filling up your pussy with his seed and marking you with his nails and the rough touch of his fingers.
Sam watches from afar, sitting comfortably in the softness of a sofa. He has all the perfect view from there as Dean spreads your ass cheeks and rubs your slit with two fingers, feeling the place where you two connect sinfully.
This is not new for any of you.
When they found you during a case involving powerful deities, you had agreed to help them as payment for freeing you from a curse that was keeping you chained and with no strength for decades. Professional hunting questions turned into favors, and favors turned into a somewhat weird relationship where they called you once something got difficult. They just prayed to you and then you would show up in a few minutes. Fair to say, you never let them down, not never.
It was one night then after a couple of tough weeks on a hunt, in which you couldn’t control yourself, that Dean had the impulse of calming you with a kiss in front of his brother.
Much to your surprise, it worked. The storm and thunder dissipated slowly, and soon, all of your clothes disappeared, inviting Sam to join in the process. At first, it was more like an unspoken deal, just talking about the essentials: what you like, what you are not up to, your turn ons, your turn offs… They were so into you, and you desired them just the same.
In the beginning, you underestimated the Winchesters being mere mortals, sometimes getting themselves into problems they most likely won’t solve or make it out alive. But that was what you loved about them. Even being simple humans, they proved how much they could worship a goddess, breaking you and putting you back together, again and again.
Your sweet moans and breath hitching echoes in the room. Sam immediately knows you’re on the verge of getting to heaven, until it happens in front of his eyes. Your legs tremble, your nails dig into his brother’s bare shoulders, his rough grip on your hips forcing you up and down while you ride your high. Sam is not even looking at your face, but his cock twitches and he licks his lips unconsciously as he pictures your plump mouth open and your eyes rolling to the back of your head.
Of all the women he had fucked, you were simply ethereal. His brother had agreed about that before.
You lean to kiss Dean in your afterglow, sloppy and wet, rolling your hips just slowly to keep torturing him. A devilishly smirk appears on your lips when he grunts against your mouth. Before he cums, you pull away and get off him. His cock is hard as a rock, and you just give him a greater mischievous smile and a hard stroke, coating his shaft with your juices. He gasps, giving a shallow thrust into your hand.
“Stop teasing,” Dean warns.
“I’m not, just preparing you,” you say, faking your innocence, something you know you don’t have at all. Not while they are here.
You give a look at Sam, who’s been waiting on your sofa almost the whole time, and he looks more than ready to have his way with you. Legs spread, clothes gone, he looks at you as if you were the treasure he never knew existed.
“I need to take care of him too, don’t be a selfish jerk,” you wink at Dean and call his younger brother to your bed. “Come here, Sammy,” you voice out, crawling to the edge of the mattress and staying on your hands and knees for him.
He does obey immediately, taking long strides and he stops in front of you, in all his bare glory and you bite your lip, picturing all the ways he would ruin you right now.
You might be the deity they found on earth, but you always awed at how they could be real.
Sam’s hand tangles into your hair before he bends down to taste your lips.
“Which hole are you choosing for tonight?” you ask once he pulls away.
He caresses your bottom lip with his thumb before pushing in between your lips. You suck on it with a moan.
“Right now I just wanna fuck your mouth,” Sam growls. “Get my reward for eating your pussy so fucking good…”
You tremble with excitement, reminiscing about the first orgasm you had for the night thanks to his wonderful lips and wet tongue.
He pulls his thumb away all of the sudden and instead of his finger, you’re now with his tip brushing your lips before he finally pushes in.
You wrap your lips around the head of his dick, earning a moan from his throat that causes you to clench your thighs together.
“Oh, shit,” he hisses once his dick hits the back of your throat, and you gag just a little with eyes shut. “You always feel so good no matter what hole I pick.”
Sam’s big hands grab the sides of your face to keep you in place and his hips then thrust into the wetness of your mouth. His pounding starts with a fast pace, and you continuously gag and breathe through your nose.
Dean, who’s sitting down on the mattress at the head of the bed, doesn’t have the complete picture of you, but he has the perfect view of your ass and your pussy, glistening with your own wetness, swollen and used by his cock, his fingers and also Sam’s fingers and mouth. He’s fighting the urge to cum right away. Your moans, or at least the sounds you’re trying to make with your throat stuffed, are too sweet for him to hold back. He can cum by only hearing you squirm. But he tries not to, just giving himself light strokes as he observes the show you’re putting up for him.
You're drooling and spitting when Sam pulls out abruptly from your mouth and you eagerly raise a hand to wrap it around his cock, giving light kisses and licks on his shaft.
“What a cockslut you are,” Sam grunts.
You rub your thighs again at his dirty words, and you start sucking him off at your own pace now, hollowing your cheeks and tasting his precum in the process.
“Fuck, sweetheart,” Dean mumbles and decides it is enough.
He crawls behind you, grabs your hips and rubs his cock between your folds and your clit before slamming inside, earning something between a gasp and a moan that sounds too good falling from your lips.
“Your pussy is taking me so fucking well,” Dean starts off his praises, and you clench around his cock hitting your right spots over and over. He moves a finger between your legs to rub your clit and force another orgasm from your body. “Yeah, just like that…”
You cry out and withdraw from Sam’s cock for a moment, whining as Dean fucks you hard. You’re so certain that his hands will leave marks on your skin, but that is just a reminder of what he can do to you anytime. Is not too long until he cums balls deep in your cunt, fucking his seed into you until you feel too sensitive that you stop sucking on Sam’s cock.
“Fuck, she’s so tight,” Dean whispers. He pulls out and watches some drops of his own cum sliding between your legs before going back to Sam with a satisfied smile on his lips. “Wanna use this one?”
One of Sam’s hands moves under your chin, forcing you to look up at him with big eyes.
“Better fill you up properly, right, baby?” Sam says sweetly and you nod.
“Use your words, tell us what you want,” he insists and you gasp and jump a little when Dean gives a spank on your ass cheek.
“Please fuck my ass,” you whimper. “Please fill me up…”
Another light spank from Dean forces a breathy moan out of you.
As you feel Dean shifting behind you on the bed, you still could not comprehend how gentle Sam’s voice can sound sometimes, yet his actions and the guilty pleasure he gives you are totally the opposite. And unlike Sam, Dean is a very straightforward man. He gives orders and you comply, if you are in the mood that’s it. He can be rough and raw if you ask him to, but he can also be caring and tender. It doesn’t matter how they give it to you, in the end you love their own ways of fucking you up completely.
A cold substance is poured on your ass, and you feel Dean’s fingers on your tight hole. Sam leans down to kiss you lovingly when Dean pushes in thick digit to stretch you out. He starts with a slow pace and you relax with Sam kissing you softly, his fingers rubbing your nipples and tits to help you ease the light discomfort that takes over you. Little by little, you’re able to take two fingers, and then you crave for more.
They handle your body softly, until you’re meeting with Dean face to face again and Sam takes a hold of your hips before lining up with your ass. He slowly slides in, inch by inch, kissing your back and rubbing your clit with his fingers to calm you down. You stay still for a moment to get used to the intrusion.
Dean observes you as his brother takes your wrists until your back is against his chest, one of his hands wrapped around your neck without making any pressure. You feel Sam’s breath on your skin and how some locks of his hair brush softly, while Dean’s eyes roam all over your body.
“I’m not gonna last longer,” Sam whispers in a husky voice against your ear.
“Don’t care.”
Your words are enough to drive him crazy. His thrusts become quick too sudden and he stretches so amazingly good that you’re left blank and speechless for a moment. All you feel is his cock, swollen and throbbing, hitting your deepest places and his fingers on your cunt before he fucks you roughly with them too.
Now you feel full.
“Absolutely beautiful like this,” Dean mumbles praises with a dark tone and your walls clench. Fuck, how you love him worshipping all of you.
You feel his hands grabbing your breasts as they bounce with each thrust, playing gently with your nipples.
“Oh shit, I’m so close again,” you gasp, feeling another climax building up.
Sam’s hands leave your wrists and your cunt, and move down to your hips, grunting sweetly as he continues fucking you senseless, and it almost feels like heaven right away. Dean takes it as a chance to plug two of his fingers inside your cunt, and you close your eyes when you cum anew.
“Fuck, you cum so damn fast,” Dean kisses you harshly, swallowing your cries of pleasure against his mouth, all while still rubbing your walls and curling his fingers.
Your own orgasm triggers Sam, and he finally releases inside you. He slows down to a sloppy, calm rhythm, fucking his own climax into you. With a low groan, Sam withdraws out of your tight hole and Dean pulls his fingers out of your pulsing cunt.
The three of you remain still, hearing each other’s heart rate until a soft rain starts outside.
Dean grins against your mouth. “You okay?”
You nod weakly. “Yeah, I’m perfect.”
“Rain gives up pretty much what you’re feeling,” Sam says, shifting behind you. “I take this one as feeling great.”
“Much more than that,” you mumble, collapsing on top of your mattress with a satisfied smile on your lips.
They shift and move around your bedroom, looking for a cloth to clean you up. You share lazy kisses and soft touches on skin before you set up a proper bath.
Tomorrow another hunt awaits, but you’re happy to be in your sacred temple with these two mortals who happened to rescue you just in time to fuck your brains out and get worshipped exactly like you deserved.
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tags for this filthy thing thanks lmaooo:
@thesilmarillionblog @cheynovak @ninii-winchester @slut-for-evans-stan @laputafavdeenzovogrincic
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lucvly · 1 year ago
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— boyfriend headcannons with matt. ⸰ 𖥔 ͙
warnings: the usual !! sfw and nsfw parts. not proofread my bad.
a/n: i love reqs helppp 😣 working on another one which actually involves writing as we Speak !! i had to reupload this because i forgot tags SORRY anon 💔
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— this man is obsessed with you. literally doesn’t even find any other women attractive. he has the biggest heart eyes for you it’s insane.
— adores hyping you up on instagram. he’s the type to reply “alr i saw it you can take it down now !!” when you post a story. your posts are filled with comments from him.
— he’s an absolute sucker for grand gestures. asked you to be his girlfriend by decorating your room with balloons !! goes all out on your anniversary (buys you a dress, gets you new jewelry, etc.)
— loves to color coordinate with you. whenever you two are going out or just seeing each other he calls you to match outfits. he thinks it’s the cutest (+ chris and nick tease him sooo bad for it)
— always gets you your go-to drinks. you’ll mention an iced latte once and he’s getting one for you every single day !! he’s so cute bye
— secretly loves it when you take pictures of him like a soccer mom LMAOO. he thinks it’s the cutest thing ever. you love taking pictures of him doing literally anything: driving, doing laundry, etc.
— loves sleeping on call with you. he absolutely adores hearing you rant about your day. + sleeping on call together him while he’s on tour and misses you so badly !! half of the call is just him complaining about how much he wishes he could see your face and kiss you.
— he may whine about how you’re stealing all his clothes and hoodies but secretly loves watching you in them.
— him driving is sooo attractive. he’s such a gentleman ughhh. this man will get out of the car and open the door for you, leans over and buckles your seatbelt, + always has his hand on your thigh.
— always kissing you. forehead kisses, neck kisses, cheek kisses, etc.
— soo good at comforting and reassuring you. he’s such a sweetheart it’s sickening !!!
— your personal driver. it’s 3 am and you wanna go out? call him and he’ll be there in 5. you’re drunk at a party and need a ride? your boyfriend’s there.
— replies to your texts at lightning speed it’s sooo embarrassing but cute !!
— updates you on everything that happens throughout his day.
— nsfw below!
— anytime you kiss him it ends up in a heated ass make out session. your hands softly pulling on his hair, his hands gripping your waist as you ever so slightly grind on his hardening cock !! lollll !!
— he leans more towards the gentler side in bed. cute pet names, makes it All about you and your pleasure– (though he loves it when you give him head).
— howeverrrr, he can definitely get mean during sex. i’m talking manhandling, shoving your face into the pillow, dirty talk. (“too big— i can’t–,” “i don’t care, you can take it. i’ll make it fit.”)
— loves it when you overstimulate him. it’s his favorite thing ever. have fun watching him squirm, hearing him moan and whimper your name.
— begs you to sit on his lap. he adores it. stroking your hair, kissing your neck, his hands on your waist as he tries his hardest to not grind his hips up or simply just fuck you senseless.
— he’s vocal. whimpering out loud, begging, groaning, grunting. all of it.
— extremely good at aftercare. he’ll immediately clean you up, get a bottle of water for you, cuddle, talk, anything you want and he’s completely at your service.
— he’s such a secret pervert !!! cannot see you in a skirt because he’s already hard. showing a bit of cleavage? hard. sees you in a bathing suit? it is over for him. he needs you.
— cockwarming him while he’s gaming <333. he’s all for it. one time you two made a bet that consisted on making the other crack first. spoiler alert: you ended up with your moans being muffled by a pillow because you just couldn’t let him finish his game, could you?
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afterglowsainz · 16 days ago
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hey lovely, just wanted to send something in for your spotify wrapped blurbs that your doing so i'll say my current driver obsession mr oscar piastri and number 21 since that's how old i just turned <3 please and thank you of course, love your work always <3
too soon to tell you “i love you” | oscar piastri
song; risk - gracie abrams
a/n: happy birthday love!! and thank you so much! i hope you like this (finally some fluff)🤍
part of the spotify wrapped special
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It had been a long time since you'd gone out with a guy you genuinely liked and thought was worth it. Lately, all the men you met were either a bit idiotic and obsessed with talking about paddle (since when did the male species decide that paddle was cool?) or mansplaining how crypto worked and why they were convinced they'd be millionaires by 25 (okay? I guess).
Oscar was the exception.
You met him when you started working at McLaren as part of the photography team. Your job mainly involved taking pictures of him and Lando, though your camera held far more photos of the Australian driver than the Brit. You knew he’d had a girlfriend with whom things hadn’t worked out, and you were aware it was a bit risky to pursue something with him since you both worked at McLaren. But you couldn’t ignore the smile on his face when he realized it was you behind the camera or how he spent more time talking to you than anyone else in the paddock.
Though Oscar also talked a bit about paddle (you still didn’t understand why they didn’t just play tennis), you didn’t mind listening when it was him. You could listen to him talk for hours and never get tired of it. Not that this would ever happen—Oscar wasn’t the type to talk excessively. Still, sometimes you just liked watching him. He was that handsome, at least in your eyes.
You didn’t know exactly what it was about Oscar that others didn’t have—or maybe it was just the fact that you hadn’t liked anyone in so long—but your attraction to him evolved into something similar to a teenage crush. When he texted you, you’d get excited, and you blushed every time he told you you looked pretty. Your best friend wouldn’t stop teasing you about it.
Sometimes, you wondered if this was a mistake, if it was a red flag to feel so much for Oscar so quickly. But then his fingers would brush against yours when you talked, or he’d tuck a strand of hair behind your ear to see your face better, and the butterflies in your stomach would go wild.
"I like you a lot," Oscar said out of nowhere one day as you watched the sunset from a lookout point. "I don’t know if this is a risk, but I’d take it for you." He hadn’t looked into your eyes when he said it, but his hand had moved closer to yours, and you could feel the warmth of his fingertips on your knuckles.
“I don’t care if it’s a risk or not,” you replied.
That was your first night together. The next morning, you woke up to a bouquet of fresh flowers next to your bed and Oscar without a t-shirt, making breakfast.
Was it too soon to tell him you loved him? Probably. Even though you felt it in every vein of your body, you held back the words and simply gave him a slow, lazy morning kiss.
God, you were truly invested in this. If it ended up being a mistake, it would definitely be your favorite mistake. There was no turning back now.
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byers-bowlcut · 2 years ago
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I've seen people say El likes the IDEA of having a boyfriend more than she actually likes her own boyfriend, and jfc it's so true 😭 Like it's all over the show:
Season 1
She's initially attached to Mike because he's the first person to give her shelter, food, genuine human care and just,, not calling CPS immediately. Her feelings for him was born from trauma and dependency in season 1. And throughout the rest of the 3 seasons, we don't see it grow past that.
Also I think it's noticeable in S1 that:
She was uninterested when Mike tried to share his hobbies with her
She also did not seem to mind AT ALL when she questioned if Mike could be her brother. He voice is neutral and curious here, not the least bit repulsed by the thought of being siblings with Mike, like girl does not care 😭
Season 2
This season has zero onscreen moments of Mike and El actually getting to know each other further. They were separated nearly the whole season.
What we DO see:
El's attachment and dependency on Mike that was developed from S1
We also find out how El spent a year of her life watching melodramatic romance films. Many other middle schoolers might identify that relationships in real life don't work like those films. But El is fresh out of lab life, she's literally learning the world through this TV, and has now become obsessed with the IDEA of having a boyfriend/relationship just like that.
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Season 3
Again, no onscreen moments of El showing interest in who Mike is as a person.
The very first scene we see of them, she's trying to get him to stop singing along to the song they're listening to. She seems to like kissing Mike. But isn't shown enjoying anything actually characteristic about him, like sharing interests with him such as music.
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Hopper indicates that they don't do anything meaningful together either. We see here that before hanging out with Max, El had little sense of her own style, her hobbies, her interests- meaning spending time with Mike for months probably didn't involve many talking points did it?
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Also in season 3, El dumps Mike with ZERO hesitation. Then she has the time of her life with Max. The most acknowledgment we get that she's oh so heartbroken is a small frown to Max that her and Mike aren't on best terms. And even that doesn't seem so paramount cause 1 episode later she totally dismisses Mike after he explains how Hopper threatened him. She just tells him maybe Hopper was right 😭😭
It's literally ONLY once she starts becoming in danger that she starts clinging onto him again. I feel like we've seen this film before hm.
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Like where are any signs that she likes Mike as an individual, and is falling for who he really is, rather than simply being attached due to trauma, and liking the concept of doing romantic things (ie: kissing, dancing at the ball, etc.)
Season 4
This is the season it becomes the MOST OBVIOUS: El loves the concept of a happy relationship and being loved, but not really loving Mike for who he is. And bringing in Will's feelings just emphasizes this point.
To start, El continues doing all these relationship-y things that she did in the start of S3. She has Mike's name and pictures plastered all over her room. She makes a "Mike box" with his pictures decorated all over it. But the thing is: this is all sort of a façade at this point. We know she's BEEN unhappy with him for months ("From Mike! From Mike! From Mike!"). But with all these items, she's basically trying to convince herself that she's in this happy, fantasy, movie-like relationship, like she probably watched in hopper's cabin in season 2.
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And then, there's the sheer difference between her and WILL in their feelings for Mike. We see it right off the bat when Mike comes to the airport: Will and El both have plans to give Mike something.
Will plans to give him a painting he worked extremely hard on. The painting is a connection of what they BOTH love: DnD, and it includes their friends who also play the game. It's very personal and immediately touches Mike. What's more is, the painting illustrates the exact qualities about Mike that Will loves: his leadership, his bravery, his guidance. This painting literally spells out to us that Will truly loves Mike for WHO HE IS.
Meanwhile, El plans on giving Mike a fun reunion date. She has the whole day planned out. And immediately: we see that what she wants to do doesn't actually takes Mike's interests and personality into consideration. You can see and hear the strain in his voice when he talks about "burritos for breakfast" 😬
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You can see how he's not that relaxed at rinkomania, and nervous about skating, saying he's clumsy. He probably would've much preferred movies and playing a board game, over skating. But El has her own ideas. When she brings Mike to rinkomania, she tries to act really cool about it. She wants to impress him, wants to seem like she fits in and belongs.
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Her present was never actually ABOUT Mike, and about loving Mike that she would plan this huge date for him. Her present was about her desperately wanting to have this cool date like every other normal teen girl might, with a normal boyfriend, and make it seem like they have a happy perfect relationship.
And then finally we reach their S4 fight. I find it extremely interesting how Hopper's cabin is framed in the background during their whole fight. It's almost like an indication that her desperate need to be loved by Mike stems from her trying to cope with losing Hopper and the hole left by him, that clearly did not exist when she happily dumped Mike in S3.
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In their fight, when the topic of bullying comes up, Mike says he understands her, but El is quick to say he doesn't. She thinks Mike doesn't understand her, but this is just as much her not understanding HIM as well.
She doesn't get the extent of Mike's insecurities (definitely partially a result of bullying), something that Mike later divulges to WILL and not her. If the writers wanted to show us how much El understands Mike and loves him for who he is, her and Mike would work through his insecurities in their rs together, NOT through a middle man.
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Overall it's pretty striking that we've never once heard El actually compliment Mike, or articulate, or even show what exactly she loves about him through four whole seasons. I mean...
Attachment to him due to trauma or grief =/= loving him for who he is.
Wanting to BE loved =/= loving him for who he is.
So really in terms of a relationship, what El ACTUALLY wants is the concept/idea of a regular boyfriend, and a happy easy relationship, all in an attempt to feel normal. And that's why we see them fall apart the way they do in season 4, and why Will is currently so involved. Because Will DOES see and love Mike for exactly who he is.
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ssahotchnerr · 7 months ago
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aaron helping out with little ellie’s ballet class shows whether it’s behind the stage, helping coach them, helping with lighting or stage props
he’s such stage dad material and as jack isn’t interested in it he gets to experience it with ellie for the first time as she does her ballet classes as a toddler
he’d so try to learn how to make and sew costumes for the shows or how to direct or help with music
and he’d invite the whole of the bau, his entire family & friends too and jack & haley’s side of the family as ellie has been raised around them too and they consider her family too
and afterwards, aaron always greets his baby girl with a huge hug, huge smile & kiss and a big bouquet of pink roses & giant teddy before taking her and jack out to their fave kid friendly restaurant
aaron being equally involved with ellie in dance as he is for jack and soccer <333
i can see him being a bit worried about ellie feeling overlooked, like he's jack's soccer coach, so they spend a lot of time together, and he wants to show up for ellie just as much. it starts off with him just simply taking her to dance class, but then he finds more ways to be involved the longer she's at the studio - applicable with his tight schedule of course. plus he never realized how much he would love being a dance dad 😭 it's a whole new experience and he loves seeing ellie shine in something she loves to do.
aaron's totally the behind the stage dad 😭 he has a headset for cues; he's making sure every dancer is ready to go, gets on stage at the right moment, stays hydrated, gives them little pep talks if they're nervous 🥺🥹 he's just everyone's dance dad and everyone simply adores him 😭 but also, since there's multiple recitals, he does set aside one to be in the audience with you and jack, to actually watch the show and to see his ellie bellie dance her little heart out 🥹 and he's 100% filming too 🥹💓💞💓
making costumes!!! he stitches and sequins and sews on the jet, using the downtime to his advantage 😭 just as he does when he's figuring out soccer plays for jack's team. hehe the team clowns him a bit for it🤭, because who would they be if they didn't ??? but as everyone's getting sleep or doing their own thing, aaron's sat in the corner with the overhead light on, sewing ellie's costumes <3🥰
and omg you can bet the bau is front row at the performances. sean comes!! and haley's family too 🥹 they love her just as much as they love jack, they have even before she was born. and again with jessica having kids of her own, ellie LOVES her cousins. hehe after the recital she sees them and her whole little face lights up, running towards them to give soo many hugs <3
aaron's just the most proud dad ever, he can't stop smiling 🥹 for every single performance, he'll get ellie a bouquet of flowers, one that'll sit proudly in her room next to all the pictures of her in her dance costumes 🥰 speaking of, her whole room is themed to ballet too 🥹 and sticking to ellie's love for her chucky doll LOL, he has that in hand waiting for her too (it's mainly brought to soothe any nerves she may have prior to her performance) 🥰🥰 hehe he scoops her up in his arms and tells her how amazing she did, and how proud he, you and jack are of her 🥹💞💓💞💓 after too, he sticks around for clean up, makes sure every kid is accounted for and has found their family amidst the crowd, and then you'll all go out for a treat or dinner and a treat 🥰💓💞
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gyeomsweetgyeom · 1 year ago
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[4:51 pm]
Everyone who worked for CEO!Johnny could say he was a good boss. He knew every single one of his employees names from the interns to the mailmen that came in on a regular basis. He was friendly and never found the small talk with his peers to be annoying since he was usually the one to initiate it. He had even told his employees to simply call him John, no titles, just John. He was so friendly and open to being there for his employees that he had taken to removing the door from his office for some reason no one could remember.
Despite how friendly he was, he was also a very private man. He loved to learn and hear about his peers' lives, but very rarely shared personal information about himself. They knew where he went to school because he had his degrees up on his walls, but besides that there was nothing. His office was minimally decorated, no personal wallpaper on his computer, and they never heard him take personal calls. They had guessed he had friends just because he was so friendly it would be weird if he didn't. They had also guessed that a guy as good as he was would have to be taken.
Everyone in the office had their own theories. Maybe he had a college love that he was hung up on, maybe he was dating a celebrity and had to keep the details to himself, but the most popular theory involved you. You were on the board of a company that regularly worked with Johnny's company, so you were in and out of the building at least a few times a month.
A lot of the office wondered when you two would get together. Every time you came in Johnny seemed happier, more smiley, and laughing more. He took you out to lunch regularly which he never did with any other person from your company that came in. Some people had even sworn they had heard Johnny on the phone with you a couple times, his personal cellphone, talking about something besides work. Thus, a bet was started among the employees about when or even if the two of you would get together. The winning pot was big, with three of the main groups having already lost because after a month, 3 months, and 5 months there seemed to be no changes or confirmation between the two of you.
Today, the air felt different, the 6 month betters were more excited than ever for some reason they couldn't explain. Today, you were coming in for a meeting, and there was just some electricity in the air that they couldn't describe.
No one would be able to dispute that there was a serious lack of work being done while you and Johnny were in the conference room which was thankfully had glass walls. The noticed the smiles you both sent at each other, laughs that had to have been over something else besides the paperwork you were both looking over. Then there was the goldmine, the jackpot, a single lingering touch of your hands as you slid the file back in Johnny's direction.
There were whispers that the prize pool had just been won, and they only got louder as Johnny led you out of the office with a hand at the small of your back.
"I'll see you at home," you told him quietly as you both walked toward the elevator.
"Home?!" Johnny's secretary screeched.
You both froze mid-stride to look at her, taking notice of all the anticipated pairs of eyes that were locked on the both of you. Johnny lets out a surprised chuckle, “Yes, we live together.”
“Since when?” Another surprised voice calls out.
“Since shortly after we got engaged,” you reply calmly.
“You’re engaged?!” Various voices scream.
Johnny laughs heartily, “We’ve been married for four years. Why are you all acting surprised?”
“Nobody knew, we’ve had a bet going on for almost six months,” Johnny’s secretary replies while running a hand over her face.
“Dude- sorry, John. How could you not tell us?” An intern asks.
“I thought it was obvious. There’s a picture from our wedding day on my desk and I wear a wedding band,” Johnny shrugs shyly.
You quickly slap Johnny’s shoulder, “That wallet sized picture John?! How are they meant to see that?”
“I swear I said something before,” he pauses, “I told my last secretary… who retired at the start of the year. My bad guys.”
“Well, Johnny will make sure that he matches the prize pool with end of year bonuses. I’ll see you all soon, and see you at home. We’re going to have a nice chat,” you smile at the office, narrowing your eyes at your husband before you continue on your way to the elevator.
Johnny sighs, running a hand through his hair, “Thanks a lot guys. Wish I had a door to slam right now, do you know how long the waitlist is at our favorite restaurant is so I can fix this the right way? Two months. Can you let me in on the plan in advance next time?”
“We’re not going to bet on you finding romance as a married man, can you let us get to work now?” Another intern asks.
“As if you were working during that meeting we just had, forget about those bonuses now,” Johnny smirks.
His secretary smiles menacingly, “Then forget about that chat at home being short, I have backup now. And don’t forget who makes those reservations at your favorite restaurant.”
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lionhanie · 6 months ago
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lee riwoo ; everything i didn’t say
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VERY angsty (be warned i cried), ex boyfriend! riwoo, first love gone wrong :(, i refer to riwoo by his birth name (sanghyeok), did not really proofread :P
word count: 1.4k
warnings: cursing, relationship issues (yikes), angst
this work is part of my boynextdoor as old 5sos songs series! ↳ if you want to listen to the song, link is here
a/n: i can't lie i think i wrote riwoo out to be kind of a douche in this but it was For The Angst ok. and also he's remorseful about it so... it's fine i guess loooool
likes ♡ and reblogs ↺ always appreciated!
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sanghyeok is stuck in a loop. photobooth pictures of the two of you, the (now) dead bouquet you got him after his first performance, the hoodie that you’d always wear when you came over. he can’t look around his apartment without being reminded of your relationship, but he’d rather die than get rid of the remaining traces of you in his life. the two of you were highschool sweethearts; becoming dance partners at random in a club after school and the rest was history.
your chemistry was unmatched, not just while you were dancing together, but even when the music stopped, it was just you two in your own world. really, it was perfect-- everyone around you two was convinced you guys were going to be together forever with the way you looked at each other with literal hearts in your eyes. 
that is, until it was time for the two of you to part following your graduation. sanghyeok was moving a 3-hour train ride away from your hometown, making it much harder to see each other frequently. it worked for a while, he likes to think. every other saturday, you’d always wake up early in the morning to catch the first train over to your boyfriend-- but even then, you’d only get to spend less than a full twenty four hours together before you needed to go home for class on monday. there wasn’t any… bad blood between you two per se, but rather life seemed to get in the way of your relationship. 
“the way you held me / i wish that i’d put you first / i was wrong i admit, numb from your kiss / while you were slipping through my finger tips” 
sanghyeok was heavily involved in the dance club at his university, oftentimes running to practice immediately after class. practice /alone/ would eat up a couple hours of his limited free time, and the rest of the time he would spend trying to catch up with coursework that was slowly creeping up on him.
his texts become less frequent, and when he does finally send you a message, he’d never be active long enough to actually have a meaningful conversation. the two of you pinky promised that you’d try to call every night to keep in touch, but sanghyeok would often miss your designated calling time, explaining that he was still in the studio, or was stuck trying to learn the material from this week’s classes, or that he was simply too tired to call that night. 
“all the wrongs that i hoped would erase from your memories / holding onto a broken and empty heart / flowers i should’ve bought / all the hours i lost / wish i could take it back to the start”
maybe he was too naive to think that the distance would be fine-- that your relationship would be exactly how it was in high school, where the two of you had butterflies in your stomach each time you saw each other. he didn’t realize how neglectful he’d been until you called him in tears one day, a little past one am (and long past your usual 9pm call time, that he missed, again), when he was on his way back to his apartment after practice. huh? that’s odd. you aren’t usually up this late.
“do you even care anymore? i want you to be honest, sanghyeok, please.” your voice is coarse, it’s obvious that you’ve been crying, especially with the small hiccups you can’t seem to hide as you speak. “if you aren’t going to try anymore, we should just break up.” 
“y/n? baby, what are you saying right now? what do you mean we should break up?” 
you almost scoff at his words, in complete disbelief that /he/ doesn’t even know what he’s doing wrong. “this is the fourth time this week you’ve avoided our calls. jesus, have you even read any of the past texts i’ve sent you?” your voice breaks, filled with both frustration and utter heartbreak. 
“to be honest, i really needed you tonight. you know, you’re not the only one who’s busy. life has been kicking me in the ass lately and the only thing that keeps me going recently is the thought of hearing your voice at the end of the day, but now i can’t even get that! shit, i’ve been so patient with you, sanghyeok-- with us.” 
“hey, i’m sorry, okay? i’m sorry i didn’t read your texts earlier, and sorry for missing our call earlier..” he takes the phone away from his ear, checking the time and putting you on speaker. 1:15 AM. he hasn’t even started studying for the test he has in the morning. “but can we talk about this tomorrow? i just left the studio, and i really need to get to studying once i get to the apartment. and there’s no rehearsal tomorrow, so i’ll be able to call-”
“you don’t get it, don’t you? it doesn’t matter that tomorrow you’ll finally be able to call, it’s the fact that i’m always your last priority these days. it fucking hurts, sanghyeok. you’re my number one, and yet i can’t even get a text back from you anymore.” he stops in his tracks, listening to you on the other end of the phone. surely he hasn’t missed that many of your calls. he was almost certain he texted you good morning the second he woke up. he curses under his breath at himself when he looks at his notifications. 2 missed calls. over 10 texts from both yesterday and today, unopened. he must’ve forgotten. 
“we aren’t in high school anymore, okay? it shouldn’t be a burden to put in a little bit more effort for someone you love, even if you’re further away now… you always used to send me flowers whenever you missed me, or call me in the middle of the day just to hear my voice. what happened to us?” your sniffles stopped by now, instead being replaced with all of the emotions from the past couple weeks finally being aired out. 
“why am i always the one who wakes up at four in the morning every weekend just to spend some time with you? why do i have to be the one to sit and wait for your calls, only to see that you’re busy again? damnit, i just wish i knew you still loved me, sanghyeok.” he can feel his heart drop to the pit of his stomach. 
“with all of the mistakes i’ve made / from all the letters that i’ve saved / this is everything i didn’t say / i wish i could’ve made you stay / and i’m the only one to blame / i know that it’s a little too late” 
fuck. he’s crying again. he can’t recall how many times he’s reread the love letters you once exchanged in high school. they used to sit in a pretty decorated cardboard box on his desk, but his bedside drawer is their new home; it’s much easier to read them every night when they’re right next to him. he’s extra careful not to get any of his tears on your writing, just in case those are the last letters you’ll ever write for him.
if he had just noticed sooner… if he wasn’t so focused on himself, maybe he would’ve seen how much the person he loved most was hurting, all because of him. sanghyeok almost feels sick thinking about how you kept in your feelings for so long; enduring all the pain in hopes that he would turn things around eventually. 
“i hope you know / for you i’d sacrifice / to make this right / some day i’m sure / we’ll pass each other by / until that time…” 
and at the end of the night, when sanghyeok’s head hurts from crying for too long, and another tissue box is empty beside him, he goes for a walk. it’s his routine, after all. he’ll walk down the same dim path he walked on the night you two broke up, and he will sit on a bench and look up at the sky through the clearing between the trees. he’s waiting for a shooting star.
...by the time that star comes, he’s already prepared with his wish. he doesn’t even need to think about what he wants most in this world, because he knows the only thing he would wish for is one more chance to make things right with you.
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© lionhanie 2024 ; all rights reserved!
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morganski-19 · 2 months ago
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For any of my buddie shippers or gay eddie truthers who feels like episode 5 is a massive blow, it's not over yet. I think that we've really been harping on episode 6 being the big coming out getting together scene, and that has let us fall into false hope. And I honestly have had the stance that buddie, if it does happen this season, will be in the latter half of the season.
This is not a story that should be rushed. Oliver talks about how he wants Buck to have a slow burn. Eddie needs time to figure out himself, and deal with his trauma. That can't happen in the first six episode where three of them are just the opening emergency. It just wouldn't make narrative sense.
Let's remember the three act structure that is so prevalent in a lot of media. Because I am terrible at explaining things, I’ve put in a picture.
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This season has 18 episodes, so we are very much still in the set up stage of this season. I think that since most of the plot points from season 7 are wrapped up except for Eddie and Christopher's, it is a good bet that their story line will be driven in this narrative.
I think the inciting incident was that scene with Weston's dad in episode 4. It shows how Eddie feels about this situation more, and can bring out a lot of growth and movement as he tries to get Chris back.
Episode 6 would be 1/3 of the way through the season, and considering it is a direct parallel to eddie begins, I am considering that plot point 1.
Now here is where the speculation really starts. The mid point would be the episode before the winter break, and I think that will involve Eddie going to El Paso and getting Chris back.
Therefore, the rising action for this would be Eddie working through his own issues. Learning how to love himself, and starting his path to discovery. However, I honestly don't see him figuring it all out before Chris comes home.
No matter how this storyline will play out, Chris will be mad at Eddie the whole season. Their resolution will not happen until the end, after the climax.
I think the climax will be Eddie figuring out he is gay, and coming out to his son. Then, the two of them figuring out what that means for the both of them. Eddie grappling with how he can be gay and still have loved Shannon in the past. And Chris dealing with how his dad dated all of these woman for his betterment. Also dealing with the fact that his parents were not in love the way he thought they were.
Buddie, if it happens this season, will be part of the denouement. Because, while all of this is happening with Eddie and Chris, Buck will have his own storyline. One that will be very in line with Eddie's, because of how involved he is in the Diaz's life.
I think that, even if Buck and Tommy don't break up in episode 6 like I hope, their relationship won't last. Putting my hopes for Buddie aside, they are simply just not compatible as a couple. Buck will realize this on his own, whether that be his plot point one, or the climax of his story. It would then, allow for Buck to truly understand his feelings for Eddie, and give the audience that longing that a slow burn needs.
Because although us Buddie fans consider their relationship as a slow burn, the general public might not. They need to create that longing for all audiences, and not just us.
It is also good to mention that there is no Buddie without Chris. It almost wouldn't make sense to have Buddie happen without Chris in the picture.
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aois-amaterasu-painting · 6 days ago
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Bass Magazine - Reita interview (2022)
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In 2022, the GazettE celebrated their 20th anniversary by releasing an expansive three-disc best-of album, the GazettE 20TH ANNIVERSARY BEST ALBUM HETERODOXY-DIVIDED 3 CONCEPTS, featuring 47 tracks. Each disc contains songs selected by the band members, encapsulating the band’s history and evolution over the past two decades.
Bassist REITA’s playing, in particular, showcases how he has adapted his approach to support the increasingly heavy band sound, while maintaining a firm foundation for the ensemble.
We had a chance to speak with REITA about the band’s two-decade journey and the evolution of his bass playing.
Interviewer: First of all, congratulations on your 20th anniversary. How do you feel now, having reached this milestone?
Reita: Thank you. Honestly, it feels like we’ve been charging forward without stopping, and suddenly, we realized it’s been 20 years. Saying “20 years” out loud makes me think, “Wow, we’ve really been doing this for a long time”. Still, it doesn’t feel like 20 years to me. It feels shorter, almost like we’ve only been doing this for about five years or so (laughs).
Interviewer: So, it feels like the time flew by. That said, it’s rare for a band to continue for 20 years. What do you think has been the key to your longevity?
Reita: Hmm… I think it’s because all of us in the band have always shared the desire to stay at the forefront. Many bands that last 20 years usually have periods where they take a break, right? But for us, we’ve always had this collective mindset of wanting to keep going, of not wanting to take a break. That shared commitment among all the members has been a huge factor, I think.
Interviewer: The three-disc best album the GazettE 20TH ANNIVERSARY BEST ALBUM HETERODOXY-DIVIDED 3 CONCEPTS- includes 47 tracks divided into SINGLES, ABYSS, and LUCY. Could you tell us about the concepts and song selection for each?
Reita: The SINGLES disc is simply a collection of our singles arranged in the order they were released. Of course, there was an option to release just this one disc, but we felt that wouldn’t capture the full picture of who we are. So, we decided to add to it. Previously, we’d done concerts themed around “ABYSS,” focusing on slower, deeper tracks, and “LUCY,” which featured intense, loud tracks. Taking inspiration from that, we created the ABYSS and LUCY discs by selecting songs based on those concepts. With these three discs, we feel we can show both—the face of the band and our essence as a live act. We thought that this would be the best way to get people to understand the GazettE.
Interviewer: Did you select tracks for “ABYSS” and “LUCY” from their respective live setlists?
Reita: That's right. We chose the songs together while discussing, “If we were to do ABYSS or LUCY concerts now, which tracks would we play?”
Interviewer: Using the tracklist of SINGLES as a starting point, let’s delve into the GazettE’s 20-year journey and your evolution as a bassist. Listening to the first track, "Cassis," I can really sense how both the band’s sound and your bass playing have developed over time.
Reita: Yeah, the phrases and the tone definitely feel youthful to me now (laughs). The bass playing on singles tends to be pretty simple overall. Even now, we still perform some of our older songs live, and there are definitely elements in those songs that still resonate with our current approach. So, even when I play them today, they don’t feel entirely out of place.
Interviewer: Up until your second album NIL (2006), which features “Cassis,” the band had a melodic and pop-influenced sound. Your bass lines often seemed to connect closely with the melodies, utilizing mid-range phrasing.
Reita: That’s right. These days, I often play phrases that are in unison with the guitars, but back then, we weren’t using the low-A tuning we use now, and my playing often involved following the melody. Without emphasizing the mid-range, the phrases wouldn’t have stood out. I also thought that simply supporting the low end wasn’t enough. Plus, I was young and had this urge to push myself to the forefront.
Interviewer: What kind of tuning were you using during that period? The bass sound also feels relatively clean.
Reita: Back then, all the strings were tuned down by one whole step. The recording environment was completely different from what we have now, too. We’d record in tiny, two-tatami-mat-sized studios that cost about 40,000 yen a day. And we could only make noise until around 9 PM (laughs). That meant we had limited time, and there were constraints on how much we could refine the sound. At that time, I didn’t have multiple amps to experiment with either. I just recorded with a single bass and used either the Ampeg or Markbass amp I owned back then. We couldn’t tailor the gear selection to each song like we do now.
Interviewer: Thank you for sharing those early-career struggles! Moving on, with tracks like “Filth in the beauty” and “Hyena” leading the way, STACKED RUBBISH (2007) marked a shift towards a heavier, breakdown-driven sound. It feels like a turning point for the band. How do you look back on that period?
Reita: I definitely see that era as a turning point. The sound we developed around the time of “Filth in the beauty” still lives on in what we do today. I think that period laid the foundation for where we are now. At the time, there was a trend for songs with big, groove-heavy rhythms, and we were also aiming to create tracks with those kinds of rhythms.
Interviewer: This was the time when sounds like metalcore and screamo were rising in popularity. Did those influences play a role?
Reita: I wouldn’t say we were consciously aiming for that, but back then, I was listening to bands like Limp Bizkit and Linkin Park and I wanted our fans to feel that kind of vertical rhythm. So even though we weren’t intentionally drawing from nu-metal influences of the late 90s and after, they probably crept in subconsciously.
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Interviewer: Around this time, you dropped the tuning down to low B. With such a heavy sound, I imagine the demands on your bass playing also changed. Is that something that's still relevant to the current band dynamic and your playing style?
Reita: That’s right. Back then, we tuned down to low B, and I was using my white ESP signature model. Around that time, my playing became more focused on adding depth and weight to the sound. After recording STACKED RUBBISH, I started expanding my gear collection rapidly. I wanted more options, so I was buying a new bass almost every month (laughs). The style of music we played back then still aligns with what we aim for as a band today. And in terms of the sound I want to produce and the role I want the bass to play, the experience I gained during that period has been hugely influential.
Interviewer: Starting with TOXIC (2011), which includes tracks like "VORTEX" and "Red," the band adopted low-A tuning for both guitar and bass. This was a bold decision, and I think it was the moment when your approach to bass and your way of playing changed drastically.
Reita: I believe it was Uruha (guitar) who first brought in songs with low-A tuning, but honestly, my initial reaction was like, “A, seriously…?” (laughs). The other members create songs using programmed basslines, where low A notes come out cleanly and easily. But actually playing those notes live? That was difficult at first. Especially with the more aggressive songs, sometimes I’d have no idea what I was even playing. It got to the point where, during recording, I couldn’t tell whether a take was good or bad. I guess back then, I didn’t fully understand how to create a proper low A sound. Now, though, anything other than low A feels off. But at the time, it was a real struggle to get used to.
Interviewer: Around that time, you also started using a 35-inch scale bass with Bartolini pickups. Was this part of your approach to adapting to the heavier band sound?
Reita: Yeah. It was all about how to produce a precise low A sound. I asked ESP to make me a red-colored super long-scale model, with various modifications to achieve greater string tension. They added a tension bar on the headstock to create a steeper angle and made the bridge string-through to increase tension as much as possible. I always liked and was most comfortable with the JB-style bass, but it wasn’t ideal for producing heavier tones. That’s why we made a new model with altered pickups specifically for low A tuning.
Interviewer: You were using a 4-string bass but stringing it with the 2nd to 5th strings of a 5-string bass. Was using an actual 5-string bass ever an option?
Reita: Honestly, I think I missed the right timing for that decision (laughs). Back then, I had this stubborn mindset that “bass is supposed to have four strings.”, “Using a 5-string bass is heresy.” There was a period when I did use a 5-string, but I wouldn’t string it with the 1st string—it was this weird fixation I had. Looking back now, I regret not getting comfortable with a 5-string earlier (laughs). That said, I own plenty of 5-string basses, so who knows? There might come a time when I fully switch to them.
Interviewer: I see (Laughs). On TOXIC, there are also mellow tracks like "PLEDGE," which remind me of the early phases of your music. It seems like the album showcases not just heavy bass work but also a variety of approaches adapted to different songs.
Reita: When we were making TOXIC, we had our Tokyo Dome performance coming up and were releasing singles one after the other. Naturally, since singles would end up on the album, we couldn’t fill it with just heavy tracks—it wouldn’t have been balanced. As a result, the album ended up with a mix of different types of songs. But thanks to that, I think, my range as a bassist expanded.
Interviewer: In 2013, you released your 7th album, BEAUTIFUL DEFORMITY, and embarked on your first world tour. Looking back on that experience, how do you feel?
Reita: The world tour was an incredibly significant experience. I’ve always been the type who thrives in challenging environments, and live venues overseas often don’t have the same great setups as those in Japan. I think my mentality of being prepared for tough conditions served me well on tour. As a bassist, I think it’s important to maintain an air of composure. Panicking on stage doesn’t look cool—it’s crucial to project this sense of “I’ve got this, no matter what.” Also, since most of the audience overseas were seeing us live for the first time, it reminded me of the early days when we played joint events at live houses. Watching people in the back start to move along to the music gave me a nostalgic feeling—it was similar to those early days.
Interviewer: As evident from "UGLY," since 2015’s DOGMA, the band has leaned into a louder ensemble with strong metalcore and deathcore influences. Has there been a greater demand for "heaviness" in your bass playing as well?
Reita: Absolutely. With songs like these, there's a clear demand for more extreme heaviness. It felt like the theme of "heaviness" was being challenged anew. That’s why a song like "DOGMA" was particularly difficult.
Interviewer: To achieve even greater heaviness and intensity, did you use any new gear or techniques?
Reita: In terms of gear, BEAUTIFUL DEFORMITY was recorded with a ZON bass, but for DOGMA, I used a Music Man StingRay exclusively. ZON basses produce a balanced sound across all frets and are great for intricate, moving phrases. However, for DOGMA, where there are a lot of unison lines and a heavier focus, the StingRay’s distinct humbucker punch stands out better and fits the ensemble more.
Interviewer: I see. By the way, what gauge strings are you using for low-A tuning?
Reita: I use .130 for the thickest string. It’s not an extremely heavy gauge; it’s fairly standard.
Interviewer: For achieving heaviness with the low A string, picking technique is also an important consideration. Is there anything specific you focus on?
Reita: I adjust the strength of my picking based on the song. The faster the song, the lighter my picking. Lighter picking provides more consistent resonance and helps maintain the strings' stability. With mid-tempo songs, you can play with more force without issue, but in faster tracks, softer picking sounds noticeably more stable. When I played with the same intensity as before, the strings would vibrate too much and couldn’t keep up, so I was reminded once again that picking strength is important.
Interviewer: Additionally, in heavy ensembles, you need to adapt your sound to match the low-end presence of the guitars and drums. How do you approach that?
Reita: Guitars also need to bring low-end presence, which means their core sound starts to overlap with the bass's low end. This can result in both instruments canceling each other out, which defeats the purpose of the ensemble. My initial thought was to move even lower, but when you go too low, the sound doesn’t project clearly anymore—it just spreads out without definition. Balancing that was challenging. The bass drum's size also kept increasing—starting at 22 inches, then 24, and eventually 26 inches. Balancing the low-end frequencies between all the instruments became a significant area of trial and error.
Interviewer: When the guitars’ low-end overlaps with the bass, do you ever coordinate with the guitarists to resolve this?
Reita: My approach is more reactive—I try to use the available space. I don’t recall ever asking the guitarists to "cut back on the low end." Instead, it’s more like, "If they’re bringing that much low-end, I’ll adjust and find my space elsewhere."
Interviewer: In 2014, you performed at LOUD PARK 14, and in 2016, at KNOTFEST JAPAN 2016. Do you think participating in these metal festivals influenced your transition toward a heavier, louder sound?
Reita: I think it played a significant role. After performing at those metal festivals, we released DOGMA. And while we were there, we also took the opportunity to listen to various bands' sounds and learn from them. As a band, I think we consciously decided to head in a louder, heavier direction.
Interviewer: Listening to your playing, Reita, even within the heavy, dense phrasing, I noticed that in the sections with clean vocals, you match the melody with thoughtful note choices and phrasing. It feels like you’re adding color to the song, even within a heavy sound.
Reita: That’s true. While we’ve been leaning toward more metalcore sound, my musical roots don’t include much metal. Naturally, I gravitate toward creating more active, moving phrases. That kind of phrasing feels closer to my musical roots. Also, I feel like clean vocal sections are a prime opportunity for the bass to shine. Sometimes, during recording, I’ll suggest a line for a clean section, and it gets shot down with, "We don’t need bass here." (laughs) The lines that make it into the final track are the ones that somehow survived the process. I feel like subtle moments like those really showcase the bass as an instrument.
Interviewer: How would you describe your current approach to sound design? Your tone seems to emphasize a midrange core while also incorporating aggressive high-gain distortion, rather than the traditional scooped sound.
Reita: These days, I lean heavily into distortion. In the past, I used to focus on the 60–80Hz range for the low-end peak, but now I aim around 130Hz. Since MASS (2021), I’ve been deliberately crafting my sound around that frequency range. I’ve moved away from the mindset that "lower is better." Instead, I aim to create a low end that’s more audible and practical—something that still sounds good even when played on computers. Considering how many people listen to music this way, I'm conscious of making sounds that are easy to hear even on computer speakers.
Interviewer: So, you're adjusting the frequency range to suit modern listening environments.
Reita: Super low frequencies depend a lot on the speakers or earphones used for playback. But if you focus on slightly higher lows, they come through well on most speakers. That’s why I try to create lows that can be reproduced clearly on any speaker.
Interviewer: Looking back on everything we’ve discussed, how do you feel about the changes in the band’s sound and the evolution of your bass playing and sound?
Reita: In the early days, I really wanted to stand out on stage and make the bass felt in the forefront—it was all about getting the bass out there. But as time passed, I started wanting to play more in the background. That shift became especially noticeable around the time of Filth in the Beauty. Back then, I used to move around a lot on stage, but now I tend to stay close to my cabinet. I think my approach shifted from "assertive bass" to "supporting bass" over time.
Interviewer: Was this a deliberate shift in perspective for you?
Reita: Hmm... maybe it was the songs themselves that led to that change. When the songs became louder and more unison-based, I felt like the bass had to support the sound more. But now, I feel that kind of bass is ideal for me. After 20 years, I guess there’s a certain maturity that comes with it (laughs).
Interviewer: Lastly, as the band marks its 20th anniversary, what are your plans for the future?
Reita: To keep moving forward without stopping, so that one day people will say, “Oh, it’s their 30th anniversary already?” I want us to keep battling at the forefront. Many veteran bands tend to scale back live performances, focusing on just a few large shows each year. But that approach doesn’t really suit us. We want to keep a down-to-earth feel. Of course, we want to play at big venues too, but we also want to keep doing proper tours and traveling around the country. That’s the kind of band I want us to remain.
Interviewer: As a bassist, what kind of playing do you aspire to in the future?
Reita: What I’m always striving for is “a sense of security.” I want to give off the feeling of 'I can feel safe when he’s playing behind me.' That’s something I’ve been particularly focused on over the past few years. Of course, there are still parts where I’m inexperienced or areas where people can’t fully rely on me yet, but I want to make sure to build that up properly.
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90s-suplex · 2 months ago
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I’m so glad i found someone that does SCSA smuts 😭😭 could you possibly do one with SCSA being a good friend to you but secretly obsessives over you, kind of like a secret perv that steals some of your panties when you’re not looking, or saves several pictures of you and hides them somewhere in his room
SCSA obsessing over reader? Sign me tf up 😭😇 Can’t stop thinking about him stealing your panties, so here are some headcanons before and after reader starts dating him :3  reader is gender neutral :) nsfw below the cut, minors don‘t interact
Stone Cold isn’t exactly known for being easy to deal with. He is anything but a people-pleaser and usually keeps to himself. 
So naturally, when a storyline involving you and him is suggested, you‘re quite nervous.
But to your surprise, the two of you get along. The crowd reacts positively to your storyline, and over time you become good friends. 
One day, as he was picking you up at your hotel room, so you could drive to the arena together, you weren’t quite finished getting ready yet. Therefore, you ask him to wait for a couple of minutes before disappearing into the bathroom while he sits down on your bed.
As he lets his eyes wander around your hotel room, he notices something that piques his interest. There’s a messy pile of clothing on one of your chairs with one pair of your panties peeking out.
Initially, he merely eyes the pair. Feeling drawn to it, he eventually approaches the pile and hesitantly picks it up.
He inspects the pair and imagines what you‘d look like wearing them, how they would fit around your hips. He can feel his cock twitch at the thought… yeah, he absolutely needs to take it with him. Surely, you wouldn‘t notice one missing pair?
As soon as he’s alone again later that day, he pulls out the pair and starts toying with the flimsy fabric in his hands. At first, he’s conflicted - he could still silently return the pair somehow. But then he notices the scent, and it drives him crazy.
He frantically starts stroking himself, and it doesn‘t take him long to finish. As he cums onto the fabric, he realizes he‘d have to make you his somehow. Either that or he‘d have to continue silently stealing your panties.
Once the two of you start dating, he can’t help but spoil you!
Austin doesn‘t like to spend money needlessly. He is more than well-off financially, but he‘s not going around wasting his money. However, when it comes to you, he has a soft spot. Have any expensive hobbies? See something you like in some store? He‘s got you covered.
On top of that, he likes to surprise you with clothing he thinks you‘ll like and that will look good on you.. including lingerie.
Panties with lace and/or ribbons and matching stockings.. soon your underwear drawer will be overflowing with all different kinds of lingerie in different colors.
Whenever he gets you a new pair, he has you try them on and takes some photos since the sight of you in them is too pretty not to take pictures. He keeps his favorite ones in his wallet.
You‘re simply irresistible to him!!
also: he absolutely loves it when you wear his merch !! Especially when you wear one of his actual shirts and it’s way too big on you :3
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narrators-journal · 9 months ago
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20$ make a fella holla
I don’t know if it’s obvious, but I can never describe Senku’s fucking hair. It’s just...how do you describe that shit??
Regardless, I hope this is a fun read, I just kinda had fun with it, tried to make it amusing to read, just a lil fake dating romp <3 Hope the romantic tone is there though at the end! I thought it was a pretty cute lil moment, at least.
Some people loved weddings, with the belief that they were the perfect time to bask in the love of your partner and joy of your family. Some, believed the events to be garish, stressful, exhausting nightmares for everyone involved. Which, was more or less the group you fell into.
Though, of course, you had no real issue with weddings, and someday may also wish to be married to your own future partner. But, that didn’t keep the sudden invitation to a family friend’s surprise nuptuals from coming out of left field.
So, befitting someone in your panicked position, you scrambled to find a date to accompany you to the event. Someone, anyone who could make sure you couldn’t be paired off with a complete and total stranger for pictures, and that no well-intentioned aunties, or eager, nosey grannies could offer potential dates and suitors.
Alas, your boyfriend had dumped you a month before, and none of your friends were free to attend with you. “When does this crap end? I’ve got a project to get to.”
Desperate times called for desperate measures.
“Senku, will you please quit complaining already? Do you have zerofucking social skills?” You hissed back in a similarly quiet tone your date at the reception table. Aka your roommate, Senku Ishigami. A slightly eccentric, odd-haired 19 year old science prodigy on his third year of college, and your last fucking nerve at the moment.
But, your annoyance seemed to simply bounce off of your ‘boyfriend’ as his crimson eyes glared back at you as he muttered quietly, “I do, but this is damned boring. Plus, this tuxedo is itchy as hell. I did my bit, why don’t we just leave already? The ceremony’s over.” “Because that’s passive aggressive and rude, Senku. Have you never been to a wedding?” You asked back, but before your ‘boyfriend’ could shoot back with some explanation about the useless nature of such events, one of your tablemates asked, “So, how long have you two been together?” in an attempt to start some less hissed and angry conversation. “Oh! Uh, about…” While you scrambled for a good answer, Senku jumped in to save you, “Going on two years soon. A little under a month before that marker, actually.” He answered, his boredom well hidden under his usual cool, unbothered demeanor as he spoke, but it still irked you.
Almost as much as his claim did, honestly. God, why am I not surprised that he doesn’t give a singular fuck about the plot holes I’ve gotta patch up if someone asks for details?You mentally fumed as your expression remained politely chipper and joyful as the woman across from you continued to ask questions. “How ever did you two meet then? I hope I’m not rude, but you two don’t seem like eachothers ‘types’.” She hummed, but before you could toss out some bland, cutesy meet-cute plot, Senku spoke once again, “Oh, kinda creepily, actually. She needed a room mate, I was just the person to take her offer.” Why not just admit I’m paying you to be here too?!“We didn’t like eachother at first, I usually don’t like super extroverted girls surrounded by dramatic friends and shit. Which, at first, that’s what she seemed like. I mean, jeez, let loose a machete-wielding maniac on campus and she’d have been prime ‘hot bimbo victim’ material.” Oh my fucking god, Ishigami, what next? Calling me ‘the old ball and chain’? How is this supposed to be believably romantic?!But, of course, the man continued regardless of your attempts to psychicly blow him up. “But, a month or so in, I realized my assumptions were wrong. She’s actually quite a funny, charming girl, with a good head on her shoulders, and some intellegence to her. And...well, y’know, I asked her out from there. Though, I have no clue why she agreed to date my ass, but she did! And I’ve held onto my title since then.”
As he spoke so easily, you were stuck with a nerves-laced smile the entire time. Only able to muster the occassional giggle to try and sell the romance in his take on your actual situation. Because, what else were you to do? Correct your boyfriend on your meeting story? That’d just out how fake the two of you were in an instant, so you mostly focused on your bland wedding reception food and tried not to give your room mate dirty looks as he spoke.
Thankfully, though, the woman across from you two seemed at least a bit charmed, or at least amused by the romantic twist on how your initial meeting with the odd-haired scientist. So, you could let out an internal sigh and redirect the conversation away from your ‘love story’ before Senku could cook up any other questionable tales. But, as you sat there in polite conversation as you ate your fillet mignon and mashed potatoes, Senku’s story was able to settle into your mind. Allowed to stew and marinate as the reception continued.
Why the hell would he got down such a weirdly honest route? He seems more the type to claim we met on tinder, not that weirdly sweet tale of growing to like me from an awkward set up. You asked yourself. Because, in the two years you’d had the man as a room mate, he had always favored blunt honesty over sugar-coating anything, so, it was odd that he had such a long-winded lie at the ready. And it you couldn’t explain it away as him having ‘prepped for the role’, you had to fight him just to put on a tux and pull his gravity-defying hair into a ponytail so he didn’t look weird in any wedding photos. He wouldn’t bother with that type of preparation. So...what? Was he being...honest?
It wasn’t an entirely comfortable realization to come across. Even if Senku had his moments of being attractive, and he was a pretty good room mate, he had the tact of a brick, and a blatant love for science over any living person, least of all you, right?
God, get a hold of yourself, girl.You chided yourself with a small sigh, only a glance thrown to your date to briefly study how he sat and ate his food, that glint of boredom back in his cherry-colored eyes. This isn’t some rom-com fanfiction. Your roomie hasn’t been harboring some deep love for you for two years unless your a beaker of nitroglycerin. You reminded yourself firmly, the flustered butterflies in your belly squashed coldly as you returned to the food in front of you.
Though, after a moment, you did dare another glance to your pretend boyfriend beside you, and this time, those crimson orbs looked back at you. And, as if the scientist had suddenly learned to read your mind, he leaned over until you could feel his warm breath tickle your ear when he whispered, “What’s with the weird looks? Surprised the unfeeling scientist has a heart?” in a playful,flirtatioustone that was almost alien to hear mixed into his voice. A tone you had heard plenty of time in your life, but still managed to cause you to gasp, and choke on your own spit. Like a true charmer.
“Oh! Oh shit, are you choking on something, hon?” Senku asked, instantly on his feet as you coughed on your surprise, “Jesus, maybe this is a good time to go. With your luck, dear, you’ve got a cold brewing.” He said, at least decent enough to fabricate some form of a lie before he took his opportunity and almost drug you from the reception hall just as you got your breath back. I’m going to kill this bastard.
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eclecticwordblender · 3 months ago
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i’ve never found the courage to talk about this anywhere else for the fear of knowing nobody is actually going to understand.
when i was 16, i met a 19 y/o man who was interested in me. at that point of time, i was quite vulnerable, my first boyfriend was in my class and was dating another classmate of ours. as a 16 y/o it was a terrible situation to be in really. receiving attention from an older male who was quite attractive and i knew for a fact had women his age interested in him felt real nice to me.
my ex and i had planned on having sex, together, for the first time but that didn’t happen. obviously in my teenage angst and stupidity i was sucked into a situationship with an older man (a 3 year age gap is actually huge at that age). now, i did technically consent to having sex with him (although one might argue that minors cannot consent, let’s ignore that for a moment). but when we were finally about to do it, i didn’t feel very good about it, i wanted him to stop. he started to kiss me, pin my hands up aggressively, just blocking any way i could let him know i was saying no.
at that moment, i just told myself there was no way he could’ve known i wanted him to stop. but in retrospect, i feel he blocked my no intentionally. this was also the first time i had sex, ever.
i did not have words to describe this experience, i still don’t. for months i did not even realise what was happening was not okay. he suddenly started to exhibit violent behaviours. and honestly, i was scared of him. he would break things around me, yell at me. i wanted to end things but was simply too scared to. often times i would initiate physical intimacy just to avoid his aggression even when i absolutely did not want to. he became overly possessive, and for the fear of his aggression, i started to avoid talking to men altogether. i started to convince myself that i liked this.
until, until one day things got out of hand. he had a problem with me interacting with someone i deeply cared about. i refused to comply and he hit me. i walked out of his apartment straight, blocked him, ended whatever was going on.
surprise surprise! my fears regarding him materialised. he would stalk me. i was so scared i stopped going for tuitions (big culture of after school tutoring where i live) which directly affected my performance in school. i used to go to school with a friend but i was so scared i started asking my parents to drop me and pick me up whenever i went to school, avoiding it on most days. all in all, i feared leaving my house at all.
i didn’t share this with my parents or anyone else (this is literally the first time i’m speaking up about this in details). i didn’t know what to say. later this man threatened me saying that if i do not meet him, he would leak compromised pictures/videos of me. i was almost sure he did not have any. i never consented to any recordings or pictures. i told him to fuck off. i knew he was bluffing. all said and done, i was still a minor and he was still an adult. whatever harm he could do to me and whatever satisfaction that would bring him wasn’t worth the trouble it could potentially land him in.
eventually he got tired and left me alone. i found out a couple of weeks later he was dating someone else. this girl was my age too. i wanted to warn her but i was to frightened to do anything that might trace me back to him.
i’m 22 now. i don’t think i have still processed this entire episode completely. i have tuned out a lot of my memories because it is simply too much to handle. i often confuse memories of sex with him with sex with my ex boyfriend as a coping mechanism of sorts. i only realised this when i once mentioned something to my ex boyfriend and he said but that never happened between us and honestly that petrifies me about what else i might be missing out.
i’ve never been able to share this episode in detail with anyone, even with my friends who were aware about me being involved with this man. i once tried to talk about this with my ex boyfriend but he dismissed me as soon as i started talking about it on the grounds that oh you’ve had sex with a lot of people and i haven’t (i haven’t either btw, idk why he keeps saying that. anyway it was also extremely irrelevant). i shut up.
(i feel so much better just writing this comprehensively. sharing this even with strangers on tumblr feels liberating in a lot of ways. i hope all of us women can heal from all the terrible things men have done to us)
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wlwcatalogue · 1 year ago
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Female Queer Icons of Hong Kong // Yam Kim Fai (任劍輝) and Pak Suet Sin (白雪仙)
Photo 1: Promotional photo for 1955 contemporary movie The Model and the Car (玉女香車) (no video available) (Source: LCSD Museum Collection Search Portal)
Photo 4: Photo from Sin Fung Ming Opera Troupe's 1958 trip
Photo 5: Photo from a 1962 newspaper feature on Yam, Pak, and others at their (?) summer villa in Central, Hong Kong
Photo 6: Christmas celebrations with Yam, Pak, and their protégés of the Chor Fung Ming Troupe
Far and away the most iconic duo in Cantonese opera, Yam Kim Fai (任劍輝) and Pak Suet Sin (白雪仙) – commonly referred to simply as Yam-Pak (任白) – were famed for their partnership both on and off the stage… Click below to learn more!
Edit on 28/07/2023: Updated to link to a photo of the entrance to the Hong Kong Heritage Museum’s Pop Culture 60+ exhibit, and to add information regarding Yam and Pak's marriage status.
Iconic? How?
Yam-Pak are the face of Cantonese opera; you can't talk about the latter without mentioning the former. It's to the point where a gigantic picture of them graces the entrance to the Hong Kong Heritage Museum’s permanent exhibition on Hong Kong pop culture’s evolution across the past 60 years (“Hong Kong Pop 60+”) - they are the first thing you see upon entering!
Best known as the originators - with Yam playing the male leads and Pak the female leads - of five masterpieces of Cantonese opera, namely:
1. Princess Cheung Ping (帝女花) 2. The Legend of the Purple Hairpin (紫釵記) 3. The Dream Tryst in the Peony Pavilion (牡丹亭驚夢) 4. The Reincarnation of Lady Plum Blossom (再世紅梅記) 5. Butterfly and Red Pear Blossom (蝶影紅梨記) (Note: Princess Cheung Ping, Purple Hairpin, and Butterfly and Red Pear Blossom were made into abridged movie versions, with the Sin Fung Ming troupe members reprising their roles from the theatre productions. Also, the "Fragrant Sacrifice" (香夭) duet from Princess Cheung Ping (movie clip) is one of - if not the most - famous songs in Cantonese opera.)
Yam and Pak were the leading pair and co-founders of the legendary Sin Fung Ming Opera Troupe (仙鳳鳴劇團; 1956-1961), which is widely held to have pushed Cantonese opera forward as an artform due to Pak and scriptwriter Tong Tik Sang’s (唐滌生) emphasis on poetic libretti and adapting source material from Chinese literature and history. (Note: it has been common practice since the 1930's for Cantonese opera troupes to be founded by key actor(s).)
They were also very active in the Hong Kong film industry in the 1950's, being paired in over 40 movies together across roughly 8 years. One of those – the aforementioned Butterfly and Red Pear Blossom (蝶影紅梨記) – is the sole Cantonese opera movie on the Hong Kong Film Archive’s 100-Must See Hong Kong Movies list (IMDB list / archived version of the official PDF). It's a well-deserved inclusion - check out this beautifully-shot dance scene.
Even their post-retirement activities had a significant effect on the industry! In the early 1960’s, they held auditions for prospective students and provided - for free - systematic, hands-on training to those who passed; Yam and Pak even hired other veterans to teach skills they personally were not as familiar with. Prior to this, apprentices were expected to learn primarily from observing their masters, and to pay handsomely for the privilege. Yam-Pak’s methods proved exceedingly effective: the Chor Fung Ming Opera Troupe (雛鳳鳴劇團; 1963-1992) starring their apprentices reigned supreme in the 1970’s-1980’s. Following this success, Cantonese opera institutes - most notably the major 1900s-era guild, the Chinese Artists Association of Hong Kong (八和會館) - started to offer systematic coaching to young hopefuls in the 1980's.
Okay, so why are they queer icons specifically?
The lazy answer is that they're queer icons because nearly all of Yam's roles were male, so Gender is involved by default, and since most hit Cantonese operas of the time were romances, that means you get to see two female actors performing being in love onscreen (and also on stage, but there aren't any video recordings from back then). So far, so Takarazuka Revue.
Female actors playing male roles in Cantonese opera To give some context, each Cantonese opera performer specialises in one of four major role-types, and Yam was a sung (生) - i.e. an actor specialised in playing standard male roles. Female sung were fairly common in the 1910's-1930's due to women being banned from performing with men during that period, but when the ban lifted in the mid-1930's, many troupes shifted towards cis-casting. Yam was pretty much the only one whose popularity survived the transition. Just take a look at the huge number of Cantonese opera movies produced during the 1950’s-1960’s – you’ll be hard-pressed to find a female sung other than Yam, let alone one with top billing. Happily, thanks to Yam's immense popularity, her profilic film career (over 300 movies!), and the prominence of Sin Fung Ming works in the Cantonese opera canon, there has been a resurgence in female sung which endures to this day. Two noteworthy examples are Yam's protégé Sabrina Lee/ Loong Kim Sang (龍劍笙) - a star in her own right - and Joyce Koi/ Koi Ming Fai (蓋鳴暉), one of the biggest names still active in the industry. (Note: perhaps due to cinema being more "realistic" in nature, Yam's early movies often involved her playing female characters cross-dressing as men, including in some Cantonese opera movies. However, she received increasingly more male roles as her fame grew, and from the mid-1950's onwards she was playing male characters onscreen nearly exclusively-- even in non-Cantonese opera movies! See Photo 1 above.)
What sets Yam and Pak apart is that they were particularly known for their chemistry. Long before Sin Fung Ming's formation in 1956, the advertising copy for their first Cantonese opera movie together - Frolicking with a Pretty Maid in the Wineshop (酒樓戲鳳, 1952) - declared "Only this movie has Yam-Pak flirting on the silver screen" (source - 華僑日報 1952/05/23-26). And indeed, they were popular for their flirtatious duets: their Cantonese opera works invariably contained at least one, and such scenes made it into some of non-Cantonese opera (i.e. "contemporary") movies too. In fact, there are not one but two contemporary movies where Yam and Pak's characters are not paired up and yet still sing a duet together in such a way that their significant other(s) become convinced that the two are in romantically interested in each other - see 1952's Lovesick (為情顛倒) and 1956's The Happy Hall (滿堂吉慶) - a weirdly specific situation which doesn't crop up in the other, non-Yam-Pak movies I have seen.
Speaking of contemporary movies, let's talk about a certain plotline that keeps cropping up in works featuring the both of them and where Yam plays a woman! Six of the eleven movies which fit that criteria involve Yam's character cross-dressing as a man (a common characteristic across Yam's handful of female roles), and Pak's character falling for her. Nothing ever comes of it, of course, but, um. It was certainly a trend. Actually, even their very first movie together - 1951's Lucky Strike (福至心靈) - falls into this category.
Such storylines, and the emphasis on their chemistry, are particularly interesting given that both Yam and Pak remained ostensibly unmarried throughout. This was unusual for female performers of their stature, who tended to wed in their twenties, often to fellow-actors or wealthy men (e.g. Hung Sin Nui/紅線女, Fong Yim Fun/芳艷芬, and Tang Pik Wan/鄧碧雲)... In contrast, by the time Yam-Pak retired from the stage in 1961, they were both over 30 years old and without husbands.
Also, did I mention they were popularly believed to be living together? There doesn't seem to be any conclusive evidence either way... although it's a little strange that separate newspaper pictorials depicting "Yam at home" and "Pak at home" seem to be of the same location... however what is conclusive is that they did spent a lot of time together offstage. Pak has talked about how when they had no guests over, Yam would watch TV by herself while Pak was in the living room (source - p93), and protégé Mandy Fung/ Mui Suet Sze (梅雪詩) has said that Pak would sometimes cook for Yam at home (source - 03:53~). They would also celebrate birthdays, New Year's, and Christmas together (see Photo 6 for an example of the latter).
Shortly after Yam's passing in 1989, Pak set up the Yam Kim Fai and Pak Suet Sin Charitable Foundation (任白慈善基金) to support the arts and provide welfare for the elderly. In 1996, Pak made a large donation to Hong Kong University, resulting in one of the buildings being renamed Yam Pak Building (任白樓) in thanks (source).
Thanks for reading! Please feel free to DM me or send an ask if you have any questions, or are just interested in learning more.
If you made it here, have this bonus piece of trivia - Yam and Pak were also well-acquainted with Hong Kong's preeminent queer icon, Leslie Cheung (張國榮), who was a massive fan of theirs. Sadly there don't seem to be any pictures of them before Yam's passing, but here's one of Pak (centre) having afternoon tea with Cheung (left) and his long-term romantic partner Daffy Tong (唐鶴德) (right) at the Cova cafe in the Pacific Place shopping mall.
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